Why Are You So Good For Everybody Else?

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IMG_5457There are many things in motherhood that are a complete mystery to me.

Why does our daughter ask for something and then cry when I give it to her?

How can she be so utterly sweet & adorable one minute and then such a monster the next?

The thing that confuses me the most is why do tantrums & meltdowns seem to be reserved only for me? Why does she eat with no arguments at daycare and take naps for Nana & most importantly why is she so sweet for her father & yet gives me such a hard time.

I share my exasperations with my husband. I tell him about my traumatic morning battles with our daughter. I explain how trying it is to wake her up & get her dressed and off to daycare. He looks at me and responds “Really, when I have her, she wakes right up and says she is ready to go to Miss Laura’s. We get dressed without any problems” Of course you do. Of course. Once again, not only do I feel as if I am an inadequate mother, but I feel as if it my stories of these difficult mornings seem like nothing more than an over-exaggeration or a figment of my imagination. Am I perhaps crazy? Is she really not as difficult as I think?

On the mornings that my husband is home to bring our daughter to daycare, I am relieved.  There are no fights, no struggles. I just get to hug and kiss everyone goodbye knowing that my husband will flawlessly carry out the morning routine.

This morning was one of his mornings. I heard our daughter stirring early & I immediately thought to myself “Here we go, another easy morning for hubby.” Then something strange happened. As I quickly moved around the house to get ready for work, I overheard something so familiar.  “No Dada, I don’t want to change the diaper. No! Leave the dirty diaper on. I don’t like to go to Miss Laura’s. I want my owl shirt, not the polka dots.” For a half hour, I listened as they went back & forth. I intervened to offer a hand a couple of times, but had to leave for work.

En route to work, my husband called me.

“Is that what you go through when you take her to daycare in the morning?”

“Yes, every time.”

“Oh my god! Don’t ever leave us. That was horrible”

The edges of my lips slowly raised into a satisfied smile. Silly daddy, I would never leave either of you. I love my family, meltdowns & all.



  1. Yup, I know the feeling well and this morning I have an early meeting up at the school (I am class mom) with the kindergarten teachers and other class moms. My husband has to get them out the door on time and am interested in hearing how that goes, as it definitely is never dull (mornings around here) either! 😉

    1. I’m sure everything will go smoothly, because that seems to be how it always goes when they’re with Daddy, at least on my end. Lol! This incident was a rare gem. As much as I hate to take pleasure in my husband having a rough morning with our daughter, I am glad that he finally witnessed it first hand so he didn’t think that I was crazy.

  2. I even asked once my 3 year old , if she could misbehave more at daycare and less at home 😉 . I guess it’s cause they know we won’t reject them so they can express it all with us..

  3. Haha love this! I go through the same things with my son! He likes to test me all the time and has become defiant. It drives me nuts! But when my husband is around he isn’t always that way. I also felt like maybe I was just overreacting. Maybe I was just tired. But then my son started acting the same way with my husband and he couldn’t believe it. It is very satisfying to know you’re not going nuts lol.

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