romance Archives – The Pinterested Parent

Like many young girls, my daughter is caught up in the fairy tale world of princesses and princes. She parades around our home in her princess dresses and tiaras almost every day. “Princesses don’t wear pants, mama.” They do however, wear gowns & sneakers like it is their job.

Lately, she has been bringing her father into her world of make believe.
“Prince, prince, where are you prince?”
“Prince, please get me some juice.”

Her prince is always happy to oblige.

I think about this fairy tale world that she lives in right now. In these stories the prince is always dashing and handsome with great hair, a sparkling smile and the ability to slay dragons. It is love at first sight. True love is portrayed with song and dance routines and of course everyone always lives happily ever after.

In the real world if you went around singing & dancing, they might have you committed. Love is seldom at first sight & that dashing prince might be a wise cracking bald guy. Not every relationship is a whirlwind romance, but that does not mean that it is not a great love story. The man that wins your heart might not be handsome or dashing, but he makes your heart skip a beat. In a real fairy tale the prince & princess have their ups & downs. They fight, they make up. You might not get a happy ending. You might get left with a broken heart. Life is not a fairy tale.

I hope that as you get older, you realize that real love is not what you read in your story books or see in the movies. There are no big dramatic gestures. John Cusack will not be outside of your window holding up a boom box. There will not be a mail box full of love letters from Ryan Gosling. Real love is flawed, it takes work. It requires communication, patience & understanding.

Real princes are men like your father. They clean off your car when it snows outside. They make supper when you are running late. They get up in the middle of the night to change poopy diapers and they are great fathers. Prince Charming may have slayed a dragon, but he never slept on the floor at the foot of his sick daughter’s bed. That’s a real prince.

It is February. Valentine’s Day is only 2 weeks away. Love is in the air. Everywhere you look there are frilly pink hearts and half naked cherubs armed with arrows. My husband & I are planning our big night out as husband & wife and not just mommy and daddy.

It is occurs to me that it is such a shame that we have to wait until Valentine’s Day to finally get away for a little romance. It is easy for your relationship to take a backseat after you have a child. All the focus turns to them.

It is very important to remember that before you were parents, you were husband & wife.

My husband & I are guilty of this as well. We definitely do not set enough time aside for ourselves. We are always tired or working or busy chasing Mai.

So what can a busy couple do to keep that spark alive?

1. Try to set time aside to date each other. Even if it is every couple of months, make the time for date night. Again we are guilty of not doing this enough but I am going to make a plan to do this more.

2. Kiss often. My hubs & I still kiss every day.

3. Be each other’s best friend. My husband & I just get each other. We always have. We have inside jokes. We crack movie quotes with one another. He is the first person I want to talk to when I have good news, bad news or juicy gossip.

4. Say I love you & mean it. Say it before bed or before you go to work. If you think it during the day at work, send him/her a text. I love getting “I love you” messages while I am work. Nothing puts a bigger smile on my face.

5. Enjoy your time together as a family. We do not get a lot of time together as a family because of our work schedules. When we do get a chance to be together, it is amazing. Nothing makes me fall in love with my husband more than watching him with our little girl.

6. Cuddle. I love snuggle time on the couch.

7. Flirt with each other. Just because you are an “old” married couple doesn’t mean that you can’t still be playful with one another. Give your spouse a little pat on the behind. Complement each other & don’t forget to still giggle at his jokes.

8. Hold hands. We hold hands while driving in the car or walking together.

9. Communicate. Air your grievances. Do not let things fester & grow. It leads to resentment & hard feelings. Strong communication is key. Always talk with your spouse.

10. Doll yourself up. Remember when you first started dating? You always tried to look & act your best. Attraction to the physical appearance is usually the first thing that draws us together. It is easy to get comfortable & forget this.

11. Look through old photos. Not as if you have forgotten, but looking through old photos or watching your wedding video together is a nice way to remember what it was that made you fall in love with each other in the beginning.

One of my favorite quotes about marriage is “A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” Mignon McLaughlin

Find a reason to fall in love with your spouse daily.

What do you do to keep your romance alive? Please share your marriage secrets.

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romance

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