Keeping The Romance After Kids

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It is February. Valentine’s Day is only 2 weeks away. Love is in the air. Everywhere you look there are frilly pink hearts and half naked cherubs armed with arrows. My husband & I are planning our big night out as husband & wife and not just mommy and daddy.

It is occurs to me that it is such a shame that we have to wait until Valentine’s Day to finally get away for a little romance. It is easy for your relationship to take a backseat after you have a child. All the focus turns to them.

It is very important to remember that before you were parents, you were husband & wife.

My husband & I are guilty of this as well. We definitely do not set enough time aside for ourselves. We are always tired or working or busy chasing Mai.

So what can a busy couple do to keep that spark alive?

1. Try to set time aside to date each other. Even if it is every couple of months, make the time for date night. Again we are guilty of not doing this enough but I am going to make a plan to do this more.

2. Kiss often. My hubs & I still kiss every day.

3. Be each other’s best friend. My husband & I just get each other. We always have. We have inside jokes. We crack movie quotes with one another. He is the first person I want to talk to when I have good news, bad news or juicy gossip.

4. Say I love you & mean it. Say it before bed or before you go to work. If you think it during the day at work, send him/her a text. I love getting “I love you” messages while I am work. Nothing puts a bigger smile on my face.

5. Enjoy your time together as a family. We do not get a lot of time together as a family because of our work schedules. When we do get a chance to be together, it is amazing. Nothing makes me fall in love with my husband more than watching him with our little girl.

6. Cuddle. I love snuggle time on the couch.

7. Flirt with each other. Just because you are an “old” married couple doesn’t mean that you can’t still be playful with one another. Give your spouse a little pat on the behind. Complement each other & don’t forget to still giggle at his jokes.

8. Hold hands. We hold hands while driving in the car or walking together.

9. Communicate. Air your grievances. Do not let things fester & grow. It leads to resentment & hard feelings. Strong communication is key. Always talk with your spouse.

10. Doll yourself up. Remember when you first started dating? You always tried to look & act your best. Attraction to the physical appearance is usually the first thing that draws us together. It is easy to get comfortable & forget this.

11. Look through old photos. Not as if you have forgotten, but looking through old photos or watching your wedding video together is a nice way to remember what it was that made you fall in love with each other in the beginning.

One of my favorite quotes about marriage is “A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” Mignon McLaughlin


Find a reason to fall in love with your spouse daily.

What do you do to keep your romance alive? Please share your marriage secrets.

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  1. Wonderful advice and when you have small kids, you are right sometimes we forget to do so much of this. I am just as guilty as the next and will readily admit it. But I do try my best to incorporate many of these as much as I can/ Thanks for sharing and have a great weekend 🙂

  2. This is all such good advice. I think that many people forget that children learn how relationships work from their parents. If you want your kids to have healthy attitudes toward relationships start with the one you have.

  3. My husband and I quickly see the toll it takes on our relationship when we don’t set time for each other. It’s so important to make marriage a priority.

  4. After all these years I still dig my husband big time. I think one of the reasons we’ve lasted so long is because not only do I love him, but I really LIKE him. I was definitely blessed in the “good husband” department!

  5. This is such great advice, and definitely well worth putting into action. I am married to my best friend and we still act like newly weds even though we’ve been married long past the newly wed stage.

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