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Life

Some Day My Prince Will Come

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Like many young girls, my daughter is caught up in the fairy tale world of princesses and princes. She parades around our home in her princess dresses and tiaras almost every day. “Princesses don’t wear pants, mama.” They do however, wear gowns & sneakers like it is their job.

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Lately, she has been bringing her father into her world of make believe.
“Prince, prince, where are you prince?”
“Prince, please get me some juice.”

Her prince is always happy to oblige.

I think about this fairy tale world that she lives in right now. In these stories the prince is always dashing and handsome with great hair, a sparkling smile and the ability to slay dragons. It is love at first sight. True love is portrayed with song and dance routines and of course everyone always lives happily ever after.

In the real world if you went around singing & dancing, they might have you committed. Love is seldom at first sight & that dashing prince might be a wise cracking bald guy. Not every relationship is a whirlwind romance, but that does not mean that it is not a great love story. The man that wins your heart might not be handsome or dashing, but he makes your heart skip a beat. In a real fairy tale the prince & princess have their ups & downs. They fight, they make up. You might not get a happy ending. You might get left with a broken heart. Life is not a fairy tale.

I hope that as you get older, you realize that real love is not what you read in your story books or see in the movies. There are no big dramatic gestures. John Cusack will not be outside of your window holding up a boom box. There will not be a mail box full of love letters from Ryan Gosling. Real love is flawed, it takes work. It requires communication, patience & understanding.

Real princes are men like your father. They clean off your car when it snows outside. They make supper when you are running late. They get up in the middle of the night to change poopy diapers and they are great fathers. Prince Charming may have slayed a dragon, but he never slept on the floor at the foot of his sick daughter’s bed. That’s a real prince.

Some Days I’m A Bad Mom

232323232-fp83232-uqcshlukaxroqdfv3-336-nu=335---53-;;7-WSNRCG=3;326-;285336nu0mrjSome days I’m a good mom – I feed you veggies & fruit

I keep my calm & don’t yell, even when we’re in a dispute

Some days I’m a lazy mom – I stop at Mickey D’s

I talk on the phone & sit around & park you in front of the tv

Some days I’m the funny mom – I am silly when I talk

You laugh at me when I tell jokes that begin with Knock Knock

Some days I’m the mean mom – I can’t help but scream & shout

You look at me with tears in your eyes when I send you to time out

Some days I’m a nurturing mom – I dry your every tear

I hold you close & comfort you & let you know that I am near

Some days I am the jealous mom – Tonight you like daddy more

I smile with a tinge of envy at the two that I most adore

Some days I am a patient mom – I answer every “Why?”

I take my time & carefully give you a well thought out reply

Some days I’m the frightened mom – I am scared almost every day

I ask God to please watch over you each & every night while I pray

Some days I’m the know-it-all & some I don’t know what to do

I am many different kinds of mother & all of them love you

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When I Grow Up I Will Be Married

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This weekend my baby sister got married, and by baby I mean soon to be 30. With 11 years separating us, I sometimes forget that she is a grown woman. Even with as much as we have been through together and the friendship between us, I often still think of her as that little girl that I used to make call me mom when we were out in public. After our mother passed, I felt as if I took on a maternal role. I took on all the worry, the protectiveness. I glowed with pride at all of her accomplishments and watched her mature and grow.
I looked at her over the course of the evening. She was so beautiful, so happy. I watched as she kissed her new groom & it felt almost surreal. When did she become this woman? She caught me watching her a few times, “What’s wrong?” she asked me. “Nothing.” I replied. She never did care for me thinking of her as a little girl. Why should she? She is a woman.

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Our daughter was fortunate enough to be included in her auntie’s festivities as a flower girl. She was very excited to be a part of the wedding. She was dazzled by the whole day. Mai put on her beautiful dress. She had curls in her hair & a basket of flower petals. She oohed & aahed over the lights and flowers and flirted with the groomsmen. It was a night to remember.

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This morning, still beaming from her first march down the aisle, our daughter asked to put on her gown again. We obliged & let her spend her day twirling & dancing in her new princess dress.

“Mama, someday I will grow up & I will get married.”

All of a sudden, I was having flashes of talks about the birds & the bees, young suitors, broken hearts, and my husband armed with a shotgun waiting at the front door to greet her dates. What kind of man will win her heart? Is it someone we know already? Will he be a nice boy or a punk? Will he be good to her? Will we like him? One day this day might come & as with my sister, I know that I will have a hard time. Even though she will someday be a woman, she will always be my baby girl to me.

“Yes Mai, someday when you are a big girl you might get married.”

For now, let’s take a nap in our princess dress & have sweet dreams about Play-doh.

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Why 40 Is Not The New 20

IMG_20150114_212921548_HDRSomething happened today. I went to the eye doctor. I have been having problems focusing on things directly in front of me lately, so I went to have some tests done. After a number of exams, the doctor informed me that I might want to start wearing reading glasses & that over the next year or two that I would probably need to wear them regularly. He went on to explain that this is common in women “my age”.

“My age”? Did I just hear him correctly? While it is no surprise that this mother hen is no longer a spring chicken, this still did give me a jolt of reality. It is true that I am getting older.

They say that 40 is the new 20, but I disagree & here is why.

At 20… I hoped & prayed not to get carded when I ordered a drink out. “Please, don’t ask for ID. Please don’t ask for ID.”
At 40…If I get asked for my license, I am so excited that I need to text everyone I ever met, update my Facebook status & Tweet about it after I finish doing a back flip.

At 20…I was called Miss
At 40..I am referred to as Ma’am like it is a dirty word.

At 20…My jeans were low rise & my breasts were up to my neck
At 40…My breasts are low rise & my jeans are up to my neck.

At 20…my nights out started at 10 o’clock.
At 40…my nights out end with me passed out on the couch by 10 o’clock with the Big Bang Theory playing in the background.

At 20…I slathered on a pound of make-up to try to cover a pin-head sized pimple & continued to try to block it with my hands all day.
At 40…I shamelessly display my crow’s feet, stretch marks, gray hairs & every other imperfection without blinking an eye.

At 20…I would drink all night & wake in the morning without a feeling hung-over.
At 40…I can wake up feeling hung-over when I haven’t had a drink in months.

At 20…My medicine cabinet held a few bottles of cheap nail polish & cosmetics.
At 40…It is filled with prescription medication & hemorrhoid cream.

At 20…A hot and sweaty night might mean that you had a good date.
At 40…It means your peri-menopausal.

At 20…You hope that you are never like your mother.
At 40…You realize you are your mother and proud of it.

Play-Doh Birthday

Play-doh birthday party ideas

*This post contains affiliate links*

Picking a theme for Mai’s 3rd birthday was an easy decision. You have all heard me talk about our daughter’s love for Play-Doh. It only made sense to celebrate her special day with her favorite activity.

Continue Reading…

Creativity Is Cheap & Imaginations Don’t Cost A Thing

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I just adore my how my daughter’s mind works. I never know what she is going to say or do. To look at life through her eyes is a daily adventure, with a new story every day.

Since the birth of my daughter I have become a pack rat. I never throw anything away because everything has some sort of creative potential. Things like empty paper towel rolls, tissue boxes & milk jugs are great for craft time. My daughter loves to draw and color and I have found that many things other than paper make for a great canvas. My home is cluttered with empty boxes, recycled ribbons & bows and other assorted odds & ends.

Mai’s birthday party is this weekend. This year, it is a Play-doh theme to pay homage to her favorite addiction. I have saved all of her old Play-doh containers in the hopes that I would be able to use them for her party. As I was washing out all of the containers, Mai saw a chance to grab the lids. My daughter played with the lids, pretending that they were various things. She baked Play-doh lid cookies, formed Mickey Mouse ears with them & cracked them open for scrambled eggs. For an hour, we played with them. I listened as she described to me every step in the Play-doh cookie lid baking process. She told me the flavor of each different colored treat. Some were sprinkled with sugar, some with cinnamon. She made sure that both of us had our oven mitts on before handling our freshly baked desserts. She is just fascinating to watch.

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With a glorious imagination like hers, remind me again, why we have a house full of toys.

For more free fun…Please check out my latest article in this month’s Seek.

Indoor Fun With Sheet Forts

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A Portrait And A Poem For My Birthday Girl

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It all began with mornings so sick .

Then turned into a heartbeat, a flutter and kick.

This little life growing inside of me.

A boy or girl, which would it be?

When you came to me that winter’s night.

A new mother unsure and so full of fright.

Dirty diapers  and nights with no sleep.

Often, I would cry and would weep.

With just one smile, one laugh, one kiss.

All tears were erased and replaced with pure bliss.

Crazy antics, milestones.

A heart full of memories overflown.

Time went by in a blink of an eye just like they said it would.

I would pause it all and slow time down, if only I could.

You have filled my life with happiness each and every day.

I love you more & more my dear. Have a Happy Birthday.

Kiddie Cliques

232323232-fp83232-uqcshlukaxroqdfv797-=ot-244;=;44=--8=XROQDF-2;86;353;-245ot1lsi (1)When I was a young, I was never what you would consider a popular girl. I wrestled with several social issues. As a child, I was taunted for being Asian. I was called every stereotypical ethnic slur that you could think of. I was a rather chubby child until I reached high school, so that gave the mean kids in my school more ammunition to use against me. When I reached high school my body changed, but unfortunately most of these people remained the same. Like many schools, ours had its fair share of cliques. I was often disliked or dismissed because I was not a part of any of these groups. High school was not a fun time for me.

Our daughter is an only child. I have tried to expose her to other children as often as possible for her to understand the importance of socialization, sharing & patience. Along with daycare, we have play dates, assorted classes & playgroups to assist with these. Much to my heartbreak, I have witnessed that exclusion, cruelty and bullying are not just reserved for teens.

Recently, my child was playing with an older group of already established friends. She approached them with her usual cheerful spirit & energy, filled with excitement to meet each & every one of them. As she was introducing herself, the foursome turned and walked away, leaving her standing there alone. I felt a stab in my heart as my sweet girl watched them walk away. Luckily being a resilient toddler, she quickly moved on to independent play. I was more wounded by this interaction than she was.

It made me look ahead. It made me scared for the future. It is a certainty that through the years that she will feel the pain of hurt feelings, exclusion and children’s cruelty. With any luck she will keep her resilience. She will understand that the opinions of others do not define her. My wish is that she never tries to conform to be accepted by others. As time goes on and she encounters this more and more, I hope that she keeps her same gentle spirit, that she does not give in to the taunting of others and that she is always true to herself.  In the meantime, I will do my part to try to instill these values in her & pray that her adolescent pain is kept to a minimum.

An Ode To Our 2014

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On this final day of 2014, I find myself looking back at all that has happened during the year. This year was filled with some milestones, great moments of joy & many memories that will stay with me for a lifetime. Here is a recap of a wonderful year…

In January, we celebrated as our daughter turned 2. ..

We took our first vacation setting sail on the ocean blue…

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In February, for Valentine’s Day we made some hearts for baking…

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While March showed us that we had a little diva in the making…

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In April for opening day, we cheered on our favorite team…

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In May we realized that clowns aren’t as funny as they seem…

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June welcomed our bathing beauty with the summer sun…

While I trained & participated in my first 5k run…

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In July, I entered my 40’s & celebrated into the night…

And thanked God for my greatest gift wrapped in my arms so tight…

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August brought more summer fun & many bubbles blown…  

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In September, our big girl got dressed for the first time on her own…

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October brought us Halloween & a pumpkin sweet as pie…

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In November, it was time to give thanks  & list all the reasons why…

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December brought a memorable Christmas filled with magic & cheer…

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Today brings happy memories of a fantastic year. 

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Happy New year to all. May 2015 be filled with love & family.

A Potty Training Dilemma

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When you are pregnant, there are things that you prepare yourself for before the baby comes. You know that you will have sleepless nights, you know that there will be crying & you know that you will change dirty diapers. What you might not realize is that those sleepless nights can last for days, that the crying continues even in to the toddler years & that your child can produce an obscene amount of poop.

When my daughter was an infant, I barely fastened the straps on her diaper before she started pushing out her next poop. When we left the house, we were armed with a diaper bag filled with extra diapers & 3 changes of clothing. Many public poops ended with wet feces that shot up my daughter’s back & soaked through her clothing. As a new mommy, I would frantically try to remove her clothing without covering her hair & face with her own bowel movements, while wiping her butt & back clean and getting her in a new diaper before she went again. Let’s not even talk about bath time, which became dubbed as poop soup. As she got older, I was relieved that diaper changes got easier. Messy blow-outs were a thing of the past.

Enter the potty training era. We have had a very successful month with toilet training. Mai now strictly pees in the potty & takes great pride in wearing her big girl undies. The problem is that she is still afraid to do the dreaded number 2 in the potty. When a poop is brewing, she dives for her nearest hiding spot. Anywhere out of reach will do, under her tea table, in her cardboard playhouse, under her safety stool. Finding that unreachable spot is not enough though. She must barricade herself in by pulling toys, boxes, pillows and chairs around her to keep her safe. “Don’t look at me, mama.”

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We have been trying to give her a gentle nudge to the toilet. We were successful in getting her to sit on her potty one day, but it ended in pooptastrophe as she had a change of heart halfway through & stood up and tried to diaper herself. I will spare you the messy details.

Since that day, I have backed off a bit. She didn’t poop for days after the incident, so we needed to take some of the anxiety off of her. When she is ready to poop, she asks for a diaper. I change her into one & then she heads to her favorite poop spot. Mai has accompanied me to many bathroom trips lately, so that she can see that it is no big deal. She is not quite convinced. Has anyone else encountered this & what did you find that was successful for you?